Friday, February 25, 2005

I am back:(

Well, I am back in Los Angeles & I am so sickened at all of the immaturity here. I knew coming back that it would be like this, but it did not really hit me how bad it was until I came back & Andrea began to fill me in on all of the drama that has happened while I was gone. I cannot believe how crazy some of these people are! I just don't understand why they continue to hurt themselves by being dumb. If they would just do it God's way, it would be so much easier.............grrrrr...............

Anyway, enough of my ranting about things I cannot change. I can only do something if I pray & allow God to do the work in their lives. All I know is that I do not have the stomach to be apart of the silly games. I have too much that God needs to do in me & I have to much planning with the wedding & stuff to be distracted by goofy people & their drama. I am focusing on God & the wedding & that is all I want to do right now.

I went out to dinner last night with Andrea & I told her a quote that I heard a long time ago & it hit ME really hard, "Get alone until you aren't alone anymore." Isn't that powerful?! If I am depressed or lonely, alot of times I immediately go & try to find someone to be with, but what I really need is God. It is in His presence that I am whole & changed. I am never really alone if I would allow God to be with me & to be intimate with me. Alot of times I shut Him out because I really don't want to change & I am lazy. I know that if I get in His presence, I will have to change, because it is impossible to be with Him & remain the same & to hold onto your sin.

I am in a mindset now that I have to focus & start running the race. I have so much that God wants for me & I have to stop being lazy. I am running out of time & I don't want to die with regrets that I did not live the life that God wanted me to live.

Onto other thoughts, I miss Brian alot! I am trying to work & focus on God, but I still miss him. It was like we were married for two weeks, so it is hard to leave him. It was like leaving my husband......................... it is hard to express how that feels unless you have experienced it. I know I will be fine, but it is still hard.

Well, I have to get back to work, so rock on my people & I love you all! Girls, (Katie, Allie, & Rachel:) you are amazing women & I am so proud of all of you! You have no idea how much you rock my face & I know that God has powerful plans for your lives! Stay focused & make Him the main thing in your hearts! I love you guys!

Brian, I love you more than I can say & I thank God for you every day! You are the love of my life & I am SO PROUD OF YOU! Wow! What an incredible man you are! Whoooooooo...................... There are just no words to begin to describe my love & respect for you! I love you!

Toodles all!

Little Vel Potter (soon:)

Sunday, February 20, 2005

God is GOOD!

Brian & I have been looking at condos for the past couple of days & I must say that it has been hard, but a great time. We have a had a hard time finding something that does not require a ton of repairs or is big enough. Hopefully we will find something once I get out here, but for now, we are getting an apartment for six months until we can find what we want. We found a couple condos that look promising, so I am praying that we have favor with one of those.
I have had the best time being with Brian these past couple of weeks & I am more convinced than ever that I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I love him more than I thought it was possible to love someone & he is my best friend. I genuinely love being with him & he is my favorite person to spend time with. I love hanging out with him or just watching tv. He allows me to be myself & encourages & believes in me so much. He raves about me when I am there or even if I am not there. When I got out here, all I heard from everyone was how much he raves about me all of the time:) I love that he believes in me & is there for me. I am so blessed!
I am not looking forward to going back to the Dream Center, but I know that it is only a month & a half more until I am with him for the rest of our lives. God has blessed more than we could have thought. We do not deserve his kindness towards us, but he continues to show us favor. I hope that we don't let him down & that we honor him in our lives:)
Well, I am leaving Wednesday morning to go back to LA......... SADNESS:( Till then.............................................................................................Toodles!
Little Vel